সোমবার, ১৩ নভেম্বর, ২০০৬

BIMAN

কোন মন্তব্য নেই :
Good morning, Ladies and Gentlemen.
This is your captain Mahmud:
Welcoming both seated and standing passengers on board of "Biman".
We apologize for the four-day delay in taking off, it was due to bad weather, engine problems and a part time job I have in a fast food restaurant in New York.

This is flight 707 to Dhaka.
Landing there is not guaranteed, but we will end up somewhere in Bangladesh. And, if luck is in our favor, we may even be landing in your village!

Bangladesh Biman has an excellent safety-record!!! In fact, our safety standards are so high, that even terrorists are afraid to fly with us!
It is with pleasure; I announce that, starting this year, over 30% of our passengers have reached their destination.

If our engines are too noisy for you, on passenger's request, we can arrange to turn them off! To make your free fall to earth pleasant and memorable, we serve complimentary Taree (Bangla alcohol).

For our not-so-religious passengers, we are the only airline who can help you find out if there really is a God!!! We regret to inform you, that today's in-flight movie will not be shown as we forgot to record it from the television. However, for our movie buffs, we will be flying right next to Emirates Airline, where their movie will be visible from the right side of the cabin window.

There is no smoking allowed in this airplane. Any smoke you see in the cabin is only the early warning system on the engines telling us to slow down! If you see water dripping from the top of your head, don't think it is raining outside, it could be AC, that is leaking water and if you notice that you are feeling so hot, that means the AC is not working, please feel free to ask the air hostess for a hand fan.

We apologize for the inconvenience!! In order to catch important landmarks, we try to fly as close as possible for the best view. If however, we go a little too close, do let us know.

Our enthusiastic co-pilot sometimes flies right through the landmark! Kindly be seated, keep your seat in an upright position for take-off and fasten your seat-belt. For those of you who can't find a seat-belt, kindly fasten your own belt to the arm of your seat.

And, for those of you who can't find a seat, do not hesitate to get in touch with a stewardess who will explain how to fasten yourself to your suitcase."

"Thanking you all for choosing "Biman" to fly for the first and last time